Oct. 31st, 2009

sub_ama: (Default)
I started writing this entry with examples going from ages past up through present day, but thought it sounded a little too like a thesis for my comfort, so I'm starting again.

In this re-boot of a question, I'll simply ask two questions.  They are linked (at least *I* think they are), but I'd like you to consider each one as separate from the other.  We'll connect the dots later and see if it comes up with anything interesting.

First. and this question is mainly for the guys, here's the situation:

A woman you know, but have no particular feelings for one way or the other, finds herself in need of help.  For our example, lets say she just injured her ankle -- it may be broken, sprained or merely strained -- we can't tell yet.  In any event, she can't walk on her own and requires your assistance to hobble over somewhere where she can get it looked at.  So, being the nice person that you are, you assist, and help her find a place to sit, possibly going so far as to secure some further help for her.

Q1: Does having rendered help to a person you previously felt neutral toward, make you feel in any way more proprietory and/or protective of her?  Why? Or should your thought processes take you in the other direction, why not? (Sorry, it's sounding like an essay question, which is not what I was intending, but I really do want to know the intracasies.)

Actually, I'll stop with that question until I get a few answers coming in, then I'll throw the possibly-linked-but-considered-separately, question out there to finish up with...
sub_ama: (Default)
Ok, now that we've got a few responses, (and as I'm writing this beforehand, expositive ones, I hope), I'll continue with part 2.

Regardless of how you answered the previous question, here's a new poser for ya:

Q2) Does a feeling of protectiveness for someone who you either a) like or b) feel neutral toward, ever elicit a feeling of desire (no matter to what degree; a smidgen to very intense) for that person? 

Yes? No? Sometimes? 

If only sometimes, when do you feel that it does vs. when it doesn't?  Is there another factor that needs to be there in order for that desire to be felt?  Is it usually of the same intensity?

Please take your time answering this, because a lot to do with these questions seems to be a no-brainer, gut reaction, but I'd appreciate it if there would be some more thought put into it, because frequently we can come up with some very interesting insights if we don't just parrot back out what society has programmed us to think and feel (or at least to say that we think and feel in such-and-such a way.)  And it can be ever so interesting to find out, after a little bit of thought, that we actually *don't*.  Or even that we do, but may have different reasons for feeling that way than we previously thought.   (Boy, am I getting wordy tonight or what?)

Last bit, which I'm not actually so interested in, but will probably be more fun to answer, why do you think you react that way?

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